Thursday, November 20, 2008

A Notice

Oh man popcorn is awesome.

I can eat a shit ton of popcorn and still want more. After pooping a little.

I guess I'm loopy right now from meds, but it's something that needs to be said.

But Popcorn + Battlestar Galactica = success.

Remember when I had a job? Yeah, that was fun. Keyword was. Fun shit with this guy. Check it out:

Hi Ben,
I want to let you know that this is not working out for me. I appriciate you giving it a try, but I am going to go a different route for this position.
I noticed a timesheet in the shop, but thursday was not completed, so if you give me your hours for Thursday and an address I'll get your payment out to you.
Thanks again for giving it a try.

(aka asshole)

Wednesday, November 19, 2008


I'm fucking getting back into the exercise regime as soon as I feel better. I'm tired of feeling like a fat slob. But for right now, snot rags and tea. Lots and lots of throat coat. Fuck me I don't like being sick. Bad timing with the show too.

Until then, I'm just going to rest my voice and relax. Maybe a short walk is in order in any case.

Oh, and I found out that Eileen (from my old job, not the cool Eileen) quit soon after I left. Sucks to be the people at my old job; should have just kept someone you can trust. Oh well, back to it.

Tuesday, November 11, 2008


This highly part time job has been thrown at me haphazardly by Bruce's brother (a good guy.. somewhat) all the while saying, "If you have a better way of doing this, feel free to do it to make more efficient." So I've been here a week, realizing that this really isn't going to be my place where I stay for any amount of time; it's just too personal. Especially because of my growing dislike for BruBro... I just don't want it to get weird if it turns into a downright stupidity match. Anyway.

Yesterday I did something wrong, not super wrong, but something that would require an item to be sent back for a refund. On top of that, my organization system (the one I had a better idea on doing, mind you) was "wrong" and we needed to have a talk about how things were to be organized in the one shot area. A little about one shots: the crap in this place that there's only ONE of, so when we sell them, it makes room for more crap. That's been my thing for the past week, going through and looking around for one shots.

Some of the one shots I've been putting up don't have specific part numbers, I was just putting what they WERE as part numbers. Mind you, I did these on my SECOND DAY here, and he has the nerve of writing me a note riddled with "we've been through this" and "we've been down this path before." Fuck that shit. I did these listings on my second day here, with no help from him, and if a part number is different (YET MORE DESCRIPTIVE) than it needs to be, then oops, I'll fix it. All I need is: "Hey Ben, I see you've been calling the Gazebo's part number Gazebo1, let's just do something like DOTS - 001, keep it like it's coming from a warehouse." OR WHATEVER.

Damn. This fucking sucks. WHY DOES THIS MAKE ME SO MAD.

Friday, November 7, 2008


One week of rehearsal almost done. It seems like a lifetime, to be completely honest. So much has happened in this one week. My first week of my new (temporary?) job, we have an amazing new president, and I've been perpetually hungry as per my new tactic of being a little bit more discriminating when it comes to shoving food into my face. I can feel a difference, plus the exercise that I've been starting up again, and the renewed energy when it comes to applying for jobs.

It's been paying off... and I think I can sense the difference in the theatre world recently; not like I've been getting called back for everything, but people seem to be considering me for more leading men roles, rather than the friend of the main character, or the B character roles that often come with being a bigger guy. What a racket; I'm a great actor, and really can play any role that's thrown at me, but no on will really consider you for something like a lead until you lok like a lead. Unless you're a really different thinking director (like me, but that's just because I come from this place), and there are some out there, but for the most part, this is a good direction from me to go in.

I think I've been mentioning how great this show is for my singing abilities. Still true, still fun. And what's more interesting is that I'm really getting the choreography and musial timing down really fast. It's neat being trained sometimes, not to mention the fact that I learn very fast.

Oddness though. One of my other actors in the show needed a ride, and then awkwardly offered to drive last night. Cool! I don't have to worry about the toll and the gas, blah blah blah. But for approximently 50% of the ride, he talked about other people that he's been... not even working with... it's more just people that he likes... or maybe just want to like him. And it's not like I even know these people... It's fun to hear stories, but there's only so much success that other people get stories that I can tak before I don't care anymore. And by "so much" I mean, it's nice to hear once, and then stop talking about how people got into grad schools or are in movies, etc.

Oh well, gotta stay positive. That's the direction I should keep.

Thursday, November 6, 2008

A bar in Belize

This is what I wrote - "Went to Best Buy and picked up some dual layer DVDs to burn some games."  When something stopped me.  This realization really isn't something that's tremendously wild in this world, really, but for some reason, the fact that I wrote 'picked up' rather than bought made me think of the times in college when I would always say 'picked up' rather than bought, and then I realized, back then I wanted to try and make it seem as if I wasn't spending money on these items, that by some chance they would be lying on the side of the road, and I was simply picking up these DVDs.

In reality, I bought them with my government cheese.  Still no luck on a full time, benefited job, and my agencies that I'm assigned with are even more loopy than before.  Jobs are tight for everyone, I have to keep reminding myself of this.  It's time for school though; I need to go back, and make myself more valuable in this environment where a graduate degree is required for an administrative job.  Jesus.

Or maybe it's time to pull the contingency plan, liquitate all my assets, and open a bar in Belize.  Wait, we have a new, better, amazing president, RIGHT... I should probably stay and see how this works out.

Rehearsals have been going very well.  They encourage my character to be pretty over the top, the precise acting I love, and so far I've been doing well in comparison with everyone else.  And and and, I'm really keeping the music in my head, even when there isn't anyone from my singing part there at rehearsal; I'm singing, on my own, with my own harmony line!  This may not be a breakthrough for some, but goddamn if it's important for me, especially since this is something I really want to pursue in my future career.

Wednesday, November 5, 2008

Yes We Did!

We did it! After hours, days, weeks, years of uncertainty and nausea, there is a light at the end of the tunnel, and we have better than the best man for the job! It has brought joy throughout my entire day, and even though a little over half of Californians can die in the fires of my asshole, I still have hope that we will pull through whatever shit that the religious right have embedded in people's psyches.

However, it's not Paradise. I still have to work part time for a job that pays pennies in the bucket, I still have no prospects for future employment; all interviews and jobs that were on the horizon for me have either been non communicative or have said they're going in another direction. I love that phrase. Sometimes its true... sometimes its just something people say to be kind about the whole situation.

Odd, I get off work, come home, apply for jobs, and then try and rest as best I can before I have to zip off to rehearsal. It's an odd life for me right now. A very temporary time, to be sure; the show plus run is only 7 weeks long. I certainly wish it was longer and better paid... and was in Marin, so that it would be an easier hike... but anyway. That's a lot of wishes, and to make things better I should change my attitude rather than the environment. And it has been an amazing amount of fun... and an amazing amount of work.

So yes, bettering myself for the good of... myself. And my nation, I suppose. I've never felt this much pride in America. Ever. Hm. Maybe I'll go into politics.

Tuesday, November 4, 2008