Wednesday, March 5, 2008

Phone Thing

This is weird. Blogger just teamed up with GrandCentral to make web dialing that keeps numbers private and shit. That's pretty cool. So I put one at the bottom of my blog here. Right on. We'll see how it goes, but if it's stupid, I'll take it off. If it does nothing, then I won't do anything with it. If it rocks, then I will give GrandCentral a hug and fuck around with their services some more.

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Bleh, so I'm eating much healthier than I was before, but maybe celery has gone too far. I'm giving it a shot, and I might be able to get through this tiny plastic bag, but I'm not making any promises. I'm only thinking of the time I can eat this airlike meal and actually be full. I just need to eat periodically more throughout the day, and have bigger breakfasts. Just so fucking tired all the time. Maybe that means I need to be more active anyway. That'll help me not want to sleep everywhere at every chance. I just wish that our culture respected the individual more, rather than the concept of working. Of course, we need to work, it's just the nature of the beast, but if companies believed in the personal more, helping people in need, then maybe we'd have happier workers who weren't always trying to get out of their job. I wouldn't mind forced exercise every day too.

But here we are, the sitting at a desk employee. Ever more sedintary at work, even more in the evenings. That's why I'm looking for full time acting work. And after that, I'm looking for full time tech work, where only part of the time I'll be sitting and contacting people, the other part I might be up and screwing in a light or building a set or managing scene changes. I love the theatre. I wish I had more insight with it than just saying "man I love it." (This blog comes to mind when thinking of theatre's cool ideas.)

As for me, I think I know my shit, I just have been so numbed by the past 2 years that I think I'm getting stupider towards the art that I love. Of course, what to do? Maybe just read some more, read about my art or technique or whatever. Take a class. Or not, I think I missed that deadline too. Sigh. Well, this week, Ben: Get off your ass and apply to the rest of the shit you've been meaning to apply for. You've been pretty good, honestly, but you just need to keep doing it. Play the game. Do it from work when you don't feel like your soul is being sucked.

Why is it so hard to do this stuff from work, anyway? I mean, for the most part I'm not doing anything. Just reading and doing mostly random tasks for people. Like now, delivering this box to Mike Pon's desk. One moment. There, easy as pie. I guess I'll give some of this a good start. Like that paper for UNLV. Or maybe some other stuff. I'm on to my B list schools. Judging by the length of time UHM is taking, I have a feeling I won't be doing that. I dont' think I have enough youth theatre experience to really qualify the training. But that's why we learn, isn't it? I mean, why hire someone who already knows everything? Shit, I hate that.

Rant rant rant. Anyway. I hope to have a good workout tonight. I'm also going to go for a walk today, it's an amazingly beautiful day. That's the good thing about working around here, the walks are gorgeous.

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