I Can't Believe I'm Awake

It seems impossible, but I'm still up. I've had a shitstorm workweek, a dumbass day, and an even more rehearsal (more on that later, I'd imagine), and now I'm just sitting here, at my computer, completely awake. I had some stuff to do (burning some [deleted] for [deleted]) and said to myself, Just burn one disc, and then go to bed. Haha. Now it's almost 2.

I had this silly idea that this post would go off in tangents I never even knew I had, but with every keystroke, it's getting harder and harder to focus my thoughts and continue to type. That and it seems when typing on my home computer, blogger doesn't put the text into double space, so it seems like I'm typing a lot less than when I put it up at work. Oh yeah, the Great Experiment with multiple blog posting is showing some progress; I've received 2 responses there, and no responses here, I think that means Livejournal is still the most popular one. I just can't pull myself away from Blogger, it's just so much more casual, you know? I guess you don't, since no one is reading this.

Been posting more at Fantastick, and am definetly having a blast just shoving random shit on there; it's so much more intuitive than google notes. And by intuitive, I mean easy. I just have this little bookmarklet, and when I feel like I want to post something, I click it on my favorites and it automagically adds it to Tumblr. Pretty rock and roll, if you ask me, and you didn't, but it's my blog and I can write what I want! So take that, person who needs scolding! HA! Wow, I am tired. And yet, he's not in bed.

Rehearsal tonight was terrible. And I'm not talking like normal terrible, I'm talking like Pits of Despair, Worst Kind of Director, Oh My God Why Is This My Profession If I Have To Work With People Like This terrible. Rich is a maniac. I've had bad directors in the past, even "bad" directors who I know will make a good show I can handle, but this was just an amazing amount of ranty petty put downs and craziness. He was just fucking around the entire time. Everyone was fucking around the entire time (Except Tim. And me, really.). Weirdness abounded when McPsycho had me be a stand in for various people who weren't at rehearsal, and then I had to run the scenes over and over as if I was the actual person cast in that part. I constantly wonder how people like this get into power.

Oho, the real kicker was how he was treating this poor 7th grader in the play. Instead of telling them EXACTLY what to do, he was quizzing them. "What does a Navy mean? Who bosses you around like a Navy? What does that mean?" Yes, not hard questions, but this kid was embarassed, and when he wanted to whisper in his ear, he said, "No, just say it there!" I hate being belittled, but I'd rather it was me than these poor fucking kids probably going to be scarred for life at theatre and never persue the field again.

I'm going to stick with it though, but I'm not going to ask if I can go to any of the other callbacks; just can't bring myself to want to work with that man in any other capacity. And becides, they don't really do good shows. But seriously folks, come, it's going to be a great show, and I'm fantastic in it!

Really!

sobs quietly

ps. Tim is downstairs eating and drinking wine. I think he's an alcoholic.